St. James was so perfect in pleasing God that he cured the most gravely ill through his prayers, but the enemy of mankind lured him into great temptations. Once an immoral woman was sent to him by some mockers. She misrepresented herself to James, pretending to weep yet all the while luring him into sin. Seeing that he was going to yield to sin, James placed his left hand into the fire and held it there for some time until it was scorched. Seeing this, the woman was filled with fear and terror, repented, and amended her life.
On another occasion, James did not flee from his temptation, but rather he fell with a maiden who had been brought by her parents to be cured of her insanity. He indeed healed her, but afterward sinned with her. Then in order to conceal his sin, he killed her and threw her into a river. As is common, the steps from fornication to murder are not very far.
After this, James lived for ten years as a penitent in an open grave. At that time there was a great drought which caused both people and livestock to suffer. As a result of his prayers, rain fell, and James knew that God had forgiven him. Here is an example, similar to that of David, of how wicked the evil demon is; how by God's permission the greatest spiritual giants can be overthrown; and how, through sincere and contrite repentance, God, according to his mercy, forgives even the greatest sins and does not punish those who punish themselves.
(source)
Alternate versions of the story exist involving caves and wandering in the wilderness (link). But the heart of the story remains the same.
James the Faster is my patron saint. Those of you who will be at my wedding will hear the priest refer to me as James. This is not because Father Yuri has memory issues.
Ideally, a child will be assigned a saint from birth, usually carrying the saint’s name as their own in some form. For converts like me the process is a little trickier. A Saint isn’t chosen as much as discovered. The church teaches that we are all assigned a Saint by God at birth. They watch over us, and pray for us. They are personally invested in our lives and spiritual wellbeing, and, hopefully, we share something or other in common. They’re spiritual life coaches. They’re personal connection to the great cloud of witnesses. We ask for their prayers on our behalf and we study their lives and their words (if any were recorded) in order to learn to better follow Christ.
When I first set out looking for my saint, I originally set out looking for a Tikhon. It’s the closest thing to Tyson in the Orthodox Canon, and it sounds really really cool. When I spoke with Father Yuri about this idea, he suggested I look for a James. “James is a good name.” He said, “There are many Jameses.” So I looked.
Saints all have feast days. There are more Saints than days, so every day is a feast day for someone or other. James the Faster’s feast day is my birthday. It used to be that a child’s Saint was determined by whoever’s feast day matched up with a child’s birthday. That’s not always the case today, but I took it as a sign. I picked James the Faster, or as my friend Paul recently called him, James the Obscure. But, that’s another story.
You may have noticed this phrase from the above story, “As is common, the steps from fornication to murder are not very far.” If you’re anything like me, you scoffed at this, and chalked it up to a bit of editorializing on the part of the wiki-editor. Sleeping with someone usually doesn’t lead to murder. Thing is nearly everything I’ve found that mentions James the Faster makes this same connection. Even the hymn that’s meant to be sung on his feast day.
James the Faster, according to the height of his soul, a giant was he,
But, he, from the heights slipped, and the devil toppled him;
One sin, to the other hastens, adultery rushes to murder,
James the Faster, himself, punishes, and God comforted him.
I would like to ignore this. I would very much like to see the story of James the Faster as a simple story of the power of penance. I can’t do that though. There is a deeper truth here, and it won’t leave me alone.
School’s been hard recently. We’re being asked to see darkness and engage it. In our future clients and in our present selves. We are told that we can only take a client to places that we have gone ourselves. We can only help mend adulterous hearts if we have wrestled with our own adultery. We can only find comfort for murderous souls if we have studied our own murderousness.
James was a healer, a wonderworker. He healed a young woman of her insanity. I do not know the specifics of how things went down between James and the young woman. But, his is not the first story I’ve heard of a therapist sleeping with their client. James’ shame turned to contempt. He murdered the woman, further victimizing the very person he was meant to help. James, the faith healer, the counselor and man of God, was exposed. He succumbed to the evil that infects every heart. The evil that, when unengaged, spreads like a termite colony, slowly destabilizing the most solid structure. James’ house was large, and when it collapsed, it collapsed hard.
In some stories, James wanders in the wilderness for a while, nearly abandoning the life of a monk. The stories mention no investigation that uncovers the murder. James is not discovered by anyone but himself. The darkness of adultery and murder was his own, and he is unable to ignore it. James the Wonderworker, man of God. James the Adulterer. James the Murderer. James the Hypocrite.
In the stories of wandering, James comes upon a monastery. He confesses his sin to the monks there, and they encourage him to stay with them, be penitent, be forgiven. He chooses a cave, or, as in the above story, an open grave. James has chosen to live in his own death. Confronted by his own darkness and sin, he inhabits the grave where his poor victim was not granted rest.
James’ ten years of penitence do not “undo” his sins. They do not bring the girl back to life. Other saints raise the murdered from the dead, but James story is not one of undoing, it is one of repentance. James the Wonderworker became James the Murderer, but he didn’t remain there. Human darkness is not permanent. Sin feels like gravity, always scheming for the fall from Grace. James chose to live in the darkness of his sin without succumbing to it. He lived at the bottom of an open grave when the bottom of a bottle would have been easier. He fasted and prayed. He knew his own sin intimately, and he did not try to hide it again.
This is a man that the Church recognizes as Saint. An adulterer, a murderer, one who took advantage of those who trusted him to heal them. He fell hard, but yet his icon hangs in my bedroom. What is this? How can it be that a man so filled with violence, contempt, sadism and masochism is held up as an example for the faithful? Is redemption really that powerful? Or is this just another patriarchal story where a man literally gets away with murder? I want to believe the former.
In my coming work I will see people who have seen such darkness. I will sit across from the abused and the abusers. I will see so much harm, so much hate, contempt, violence, shame. I must believe in redemption if I am to keep my head. I must believe that James the Murderer, once James the Wonderworker, can become James the Faster, Saint and intercessor for my soul.
Most importantly (right now) I need to see myself in every aspect of James’ story. I must see my own hubris that leads me to open the door to my own adultery. I must see my shame, which becomes contempt, which becomes violence that will drive me to victimize the powerless. I must see my own grave, and live in it in prayer and fasting. I must see my own redemption if I am ever to hope to see someone else’s.
SAINT JAMES THE FASTER
Who from the greater height falls, is injured more,
To the heights whoever is lifted, let him cautiously shield himself.
The holy apostle writes: "Whoever thinks that he is standing secure
should take care not to fall," let him fear God.
James the Faster, according to the height of his soul, a giant was he,
But, he, from the heights slipped, and the devil toppled him;
One sin, to the other hastens, adultery rushes to murder,
James the Faster, himself, punishes, and God comforted him.
All virtues, one sin, is able to erode;
One hole in the granary, all the wheat pours out.
A house filled with fragrances, one handful of filth
Empties it of redolence and fills it with stench.
One-hundred victories nor one-hundred celebrations do not help
When in the final battle, the head is lost.
The spiritual life is a struggle against the hordes of the devil,
In this battle, from the beginning the proud are defeated.
Whoever invokes the Name of God with profound humility
That one, in battle, will be protected by God's mercy.
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